Around 1 week ago, I took one of the most important decisions of my life: getting off Duloxetine after 2 years.

Life on Duloxetine⌗

It was originally prescribed to me for nerve pain caused by… No-one knows for sure. Nerves are getting stuck in my back, that’s for sure. But I have the back of a grandpa even though I’m 20 years old. Some say it’s genetic, some say it’s because I sat on my chair for too long. Either way, it sucks. The pain lives in my back, my butts, my balls, my dick, my feet, and my left leg. It’s like having constant fire on me.

Duloxetine basically solved my pain problem. If there was pain, it was only a little. The issue is that it was a very risky trade… I had essentially traded a lot of my personality, as well as my drive, common sense. To make it short: Duloxetine makes you dumb. It also makes your suicidal. I can see why, since suicide has been on my mind every fucking day.

My first withdrawals⌗

My first withdrawal with Duloxetine happened in February 2021, as I was:

  • passing exams at 42 Paris
  • working super hard at $dayjob
  • living in an appartement with 5 other people, with not enough beds for everyone (!)
  • with the most messed up sleep schedule ever
  • trying to forget about my ex

My aim was to gradually reduce my intake over 30 days to be able to take MDMA. My aim was to get rid of PTSD symptoms that I built by living a pretty traumatic experience with Cannabis when I was 15. (it did work to some extent, but this story deserves it’s own post 🙂).

This. didn’t. go. well. I was in constant pain, and becoming more and more sensitive.

At the end, I didn’t enjoy MDMA that much due to the pain I was in. I was also a drug-virgin, so I was a bit scarred 😓.

I must have tried a few other times, some by accident because I forgot to get the medication.

Each time, I get:

  • insomniac
  • a very distinct feeling of getting outside my body
  • irritable
  • in atrocious pain
  • super high social anxiety (like, not wanting to got out of fear of meeting with a neighbor)
  • brain zaps

A typical evening for me under withdrawal:

  • in my bed
  • trying to sleep, but cannot
  • my DICK HURTS. you cannot invent harder torture for a man.
  • i want to kill myself
  • loathing about not having accomplished anything of my day

So yeah.

For me, Duloxetine withdrawal = pure hell.

And I’m not the only one thinking that

A short note on brain zaps⌗

Brain zaps is a phenomenon that has not been well documented, so I figured I’d give my own perspective on it.

In my case, it doesn’t lead to shocks like people describe it. It’s more like “rollbacks” in my head. If you’ve ever played multiplayer Minecraft, you’ll know what I mean.

Some part of my brains get fuzzy, “scratch” like a vinyl, and “forget their states”.

This is followed by a small bout of de-realization and confusion, that lasts a few seconds.

I’m very lucky that it’s all but anecdotal.

Maybe my last withdrawal⌗

Disclaimer: I’m supplementing with tons of Cortexin (a more potent cousin of Cerebrolysin) as well as a bit of DMT.

So, it’s been 6 days.

I’ve had pain in my balls, becoming super irritable, yadi yada, all of that.

However, it’s wayyyy easier than the other times.

It really sucks to have pain again, but I’m ready to try other stuffs. Like, being happy, eating healthy stuff, going to bed at a good time, and exercising regularly. Duloxetine was one of the worst tradeoff ever.

Cortexin definitely affects brain zaps. Taking it reduces them.

I take Cortexin intranasaly, with baby eye drops.

Reach out if you need more info, because I’m too lazy to describe my recipe here ;)

Positive effects of leaving Duloxetine⌗

Here are some positive effects of leaving Duloxetine:

  • clearer thinking
  • more cautious way of being
  • less tempted to burn cash
  • more in touch with my emotion
  • more empathetic
  • have more drive
  • DMT works way better

… among others

(I’m a bit tired, so I’m publishing this post. See you in a few weeks !)